“I love talking about nothing. It is the only thing I know anything about.”
– Oscar Wilde
Quote for the day
– Oscar Wilde
Writing Prompt: Doh!
I pulled my laundry from the tumble dryer, dropped everything onto the living room sofa and began to fold. As I reached into the pile I pulled out something that looked remarkably like my favourite merino wool jumper, only smaller, much smaller. In my haste to get all my laundry done in one go, I forgot to sort things and in it went. My fluffy jumper, which once had long sleeves that I could lose my hands in resembled something one would dress a barbie doll in, only it might be a bit tight on her…
Have you every done something totally daft and avoidable through haste? Have you ever ruined or broken something special to you? How did you feel and why was it special? In the case of my jumper, it was warm and I had bought it on a shopping trip with my Mom. Not a huge deal, I know, but that instant I realised what I had done, I felt like a total donut, pillowcase, numpty, airhead, Homer, you name it…
Writing Prompt: Doh!
Writing Prompt: Fire and Rain
We stood listening to the high-pitched noise of the fire alarm. When it first went off, everyone at the office froze. I could tell we were all thinking the same thing. Is it just the weekly drill or do we have to go through the bother of getting our coats and marching down the stairs to the pavement outside? We looked at each other, waiting to see who’d move first and then finally, as if understanding penetrated all of us at once, we gathered our things.
As I stood out there, I thought it might be an April Fool’s trick gone wrong. It was typical that at the precise moment that the rain fell hardest this morning, the alarm went and we stood there outside Brown’s with only three or four umbrellas among about twenty-five of us.
It got me thinking about some of the juvenile, if not amusing, tricks I’d seen over the years. Today, Lisa, our office manager changed the letters on Paul’s (our PPC manager) keyboard to read “sad” instead of “asd”. I’m wondering how long he’ll type before he spots that one.
In High School, a couple of us stuck “Out of Order” signs on all of the stalls in the girl’s toilets except one, just before the lunch break and over 1,000 students were let out of class. Childish, I know, but basically harmless.
Have you been at the receiving end of a prank? Have you ever orchestrated one? Do tell and don’t spare the embarrassing details!
Enjoy April Fool’s Day. 😉
Writing prompt: Permanent Marker
The instructions were simple. Get up on the table and hold still.
I stretched out on the long, white table while my best friend held my hand. Having been through the experience before, I thought it best to go with someone in the know.
“Tell me if it hurts.” The fellow said. “Some people experience a bit of discomfort and sometimes feel the need to throw up. Let me know, ok?”
I could tell by his tone that he thought I might fall into this category, but I said nothing. Don’t mess with someone holding a needle.
“Can you please indicate the right spot?” he asked.
I glanced up at Bryan. He smiled a reassuring smile and gave my hand a squeeze. I promised him I’d go through with it. We made a pact. If he did it, I had to as well.
“Bry, you know what I want. Can you show him?”
“Sure.” he said and pointed. “Right about there.” He said.
I felt the cool transparency paper on my skin and then a bit of rubbing. When the paper was lifted, the artist looked up and Bryan. “Is that it?”
“Looks good to me.”
“Ok,” the artist said, “Here goes.”
The needle drove into my skin and although it pinched a bit, it wasn’t as painful as I had expected. However, after a few seconds, something didn’t feel right.
“Ah, can you hold on a sec?” I said and twisted around to look at my back. There was nothing there, the skin was unmarked. However, there was a distinct black line far lower. Dear God, I thought…
“Is that the right place?” The artist asked.
“Well, it’s too late if it isn’t, isn’t it?” I said and looked up at Bryan.
“What?” he asked innocently. “Ahem…It’s about three inches lower than I wanted.”
“Oops.”
It was too late, I was scarred for life. There was nothing for it but to let him finish the job.
When the job was done, it looked great, but I knew that forevermore, no one would see my new tattoo unless I really really wanted them to. For future reference, if you’re ever going to get a tattoo, make sure you check the position before the needle strikes and never trust your friends with anything that to do with your body…
Writing Prompt: Permanent Marker
Ever do anything you wish you could do over but there was NO WAY you could ever fix it? Pick an incident and tell us about it. Create a story from the that critical moment you can’t take back.
Eye Contact – 55 words
“How did you and Daddy meet?” The little girl asked.
“At a country dance; it was in a barn. Sawdust and hay were everywhere and I got dust in my eyes.”
“I don’t understand, Mummy. What does that have to do with it?”
“He only came over because he thought I was winking at him.”
Quote for the day
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
Quote for the day
“Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.”
-Douglas Adams
Quote for the day
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it, misdiagnosing it and then misapplying the wrong remedy.
– Groucho Marx
Quote for the day
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless yet be determined to make them otherwise.
-unknown
